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Living a life "Snowed In"

I said I was going to post every day but I've been so extremely sick, its truly a miracle that I wasn't admitted to the hospital. While fighting multiple illness' this week our area was hit with a huge snow storm.  Having Iv treatments, the flu, side effects on top of all the neuro muscle diseases and other autoimmune diseases, while not being able to leave the bed, and trying to figure out how to take care of your kids. This is how life is with chronic illness battles, you are already fighting everyday then bam, hit with another thing so huge it rocks your world. Being a chronic illness warrior is truly living in a constant state of being "snowed in" to your home. It dawned on me this week as I perused social media how 99.9% of people don't live like this every day. I forget sometimes that life is so free for most people. They can go out when they want, go where they want. They don't have to worry about energy, or a ride, or worry about forgetting where ...
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Sometimes overwhelmed with labs, tests, surgeries, treatments etc I forget to focus on spending quality time with my little bits. I need to spend time with myself, still working on that. One of my pastors had challenged me this year to really focus on me and forget about pleasing and doing for everyone else. At first  I thought how selfish this sounded. However, as the months went on God spoke to my spirit about what it really meant. It meant to find value in ME. If I don't, then how can anyone else? If I see myself as broken then how can I help others? If I'm trying to please everyone else but I'm falling apart how is that healthy? I began the long slow journey of trying to find me....the new me...yes I have limitations and challenges and the whole nine. Yes my life revolves around yearning to be in church, but treatments and drs visits etc, have overwhelmed my life but WHO AM I? I am not the conditions that attack my body. My soul is so much more than that. My soul and s...
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Nov 18, 2018

I was contemplating a lot of stressors in our life right now and I had to go in my prayer and praise notebook. I looked back at all the things God has walked us through this year, not even counting the last 2 years plus of event after event after event. After looking back, I cant help but be thankful for all that God has walked us though. A little over a year ago I had been working extremely hard by myself to get my Dad transferred to Va from PA after he had multiple strokes that they attribute to his alcohol use, that left him blind in both eyes and mentally incompetent as well as physically unable to move. It has been one extremely financial strain after another on top of all my daily medical expenses. I've been on Iv treatments, at least 2 days every 3 weeks for almost 6 years, as well as multiple surgeries. I was the sole person doing everything for my father financially and physically. I had to petition for guardianship of him which was a complete nightmare because that ...
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